The Good, the Bad, and the Chubby

I’ve been trying to be so good lately; eating plenty of fruits and vegetables and staying away from sugar, white flower and salt. It works. I start losing those extra pounds that I vow every day of my life to lose. My clothes are noticeably easier to slip in and out of. I don’t have to lay down on the bed to zip my jeans. What a relief.

Then I try on the special skirt that I just love to wear all the time, but have to be skinny to wear. It zips! I’m so happy I can hardly stand it. Soon, most everything in my closet is good to go, all my exercise and calorie counting paying off big time. Nothing makes me happier!

So happy in fact that a celebration is in order. Now, finally, I can have that glass of wine I’ve been denying myself. Oh, so good! And then just one little piece of chocolate. After all, I deserve it. I’ve been a saint in the diet and exercise department for long enough and if you don’t allow yourself a treat once in a while, resentment follows. Wouldn’t want that.

Two weeks later the skirt doesn’t seem to fit very well. What? Did it just get out of the dryer? I don’t remember washing it. How is it possible to go from so good to so bad in such a short time? My gosh! I’ve gained it all back! I didn’t even eat anything! Or did I? Well, we did have that pizza. I didn’t want it to go to waste. And we had company, so there was desert in the house. Every once in a while I have to bake cookies, I mean just once or twice a year when it’s not the Christmas season. And Patrick gets tired of salad and veggies, salad and veggies. Our menu is a broken record.  I mean, we have to eat really good food once in a while. Don’t we?

Oh, so now I’m chubby again. Once again. Chubby. I hate it. In the good old days, I could eat to my hearts content and still be the skinniest girl in the room. Now, I can only gaze to my hearts content. If I gaze too long, some of the calories will attached themselves to my…bottom. If I gaze longingly, some of the calories will leap off the food and stick to my stomach. The tire around my middle grows at the mere thought of chocolate chip cookies. I try not to dream of pizza. It will literally be on my breath in the morning if I so much as think about it. I’ll smell like pepperoni and people will look at me and say “she should lay off the pizza. She smells bad and she has a fat stomach.”

So, I go through my life in this cycle: being good and staying skinny for a short time,  then on to having fun, being happy but being bad, ending up at chubby, only to have a heart to heart with myself which leads me to start over again. I’m at the start over point right now. How did this happen again? Well, once again I have a goal. Not that anyone wants to hear about it, but once again I have to lose those twelve pounds in twenty eight days. Here we go again.

Anyone want to do it with me? We’ll start tomorrow. Pizza’s on it’s way.

Later,

Mary Ann